Don't Punish: Build a Bridge

Punishment Doesn't Teach

Punishment, imposed from an outside source, falls far from the mark for which it's intended.  We've all been applying consequences for too long, with limited results.  While punishment may stop a behavior in the immediate future, it does not give a child replacement skills for long-term change.  This keeps us stuck in a never-ending cycle of punishment, with limited long-term gains.

Skill-Building is the Answer

If punishment doesn't work, what should a parent do?  Teach skills.  Build new connections in your child's brain.  Help him problem-solve alternative responses, which will lead to different outcomes.  It all sounds so simple, and overwhelming at the same time.  Start somewhere and go from there.  Ask questions, role-play, imagine different outcomes with your child.  Be in your child's corner and teach him a better way.  The only way out is through. 

Where will you start?  Are you ready to change things up a bit?

Stay tuned, because the Stressless Summer Tour is coming! 


naomi said…
Lovely post Wendy. Yes it about teaching new skills and retraining behaviour so that we dont have to tell off our children so much.
Indeed, Naomi! Thanks for stopping by! I always appreciate your insights!


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