Calming Back to School Jitters

The Back to School Jitters

The Back to School Jitters are a common experience for kids, even for those who love school and can't wait to get back. After the summer hiatus and the carefree, hazy, lazy days of summer, getting back to the school routine can make kids get the jitters. 

Even kids who seemingly have it "all together" may get the back to school jitters. This can be completely normal and should pass in short order. 

Talking to Your Kids About the Back to School Jitters

When you ask a child directly, "Do you have any worries or concerns about going back to school?"  it may meet with a quick "NO".  A workaround for that...and a way to get a more accurate answer that is more than monosyllabic, would be to ask, "What kinds of things do you wonder about for the upcoming school year?" 

If you still come up short when you pose the question like that, try, "What do you think kids in your grade wonder about when it comes to going back to school?"

Common Concerns Kids Have for Back to School

Common concerns kids have include:

What will my teacher(s) be like?

Will I like my teacher(s)?

Who will I sit by in class?

Who will be in my class?

Will my friends still be my friends?

Will I do okay in school?

Will the work be harder?

What if I miss the bus?

What if I'm late to class?

What if I can't find my way to my classroom?

Who will have lunch at the same time as I will?

Help Kids Identify What Works for Them

When we encourage and help kids identify ways to cope with the first day jitters, we help them learn they have the ability to make things more manageable and that they don't have to just accept feeling jittery or anxious. Giving them support to identify coping skills can help them transfer that learning to other times they are feeling worried or upset, setting them up with a sense of encouragement and agency, that they can handle BIG feelings. 

When kids play a part in identifying what they think might work best for them, it tends to have more "sticking power" and makes it more likely that they will remember the skill when they need it most. 

What if My Child Gets Stuck?

If your child is absolutely stumped about what may help them cope with the jitters or anxious feelings, by all means encourage, support and offer them a few options. Let them decide what they think will be most helpful. Sometimes, just a gentle nudge will help them think of new ideas on their own. It's amazing to me how good kids really are at coming up with coping skills when given the chance. 

Identifying the coping skills when things are calm and your child is not in the midst of BIG feelings is key. Having a plan in place increases the chances of your child utilizing the skills when they need it most. 

Accentuate the Positive

Focusing on the good aspects of any situation can help boost our mood and help us cope. This resource also provides you with two coloring sheets that are open ended and allow kids to identify what they think are the best things about school and a place to draw themselves having their best day at school. 

No matter what kids face, they can find ways to cope! 

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Just $3.00

Make it a great day!

Wendy Young, LMSW, BCD, is  the founder of Kidlutions and co-author of BLOOM: 50 Things to Say, Think and Do with Anxious, Angry and Over-the-Top Kids, co-creator of BLOOM Brainsmarts, and creator of The Joyful Parent. She is the author of numerous workbooks and resources to help from the preschool through the teen years. 

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