How BIG is Your Child's Anger?
What Size is Your Child's Anger?
Whenever I work with a child with anger issues, I like to have them describe the size of their anger. Is it small, medium, large or super-sized? Some kids never move beyond "medium" while others go from "small" to "super-sized" in mere seconds. We can thank temperament for that, in large part.
If you parent a child with a strong temperament and BIG feelings, you are probably no stranger to "large" and "super-sized" displays of anger. I have certainly seen my fair share, both as a mom and as a therapist.
The Good News
The good news is, we can help our kids learn how to regulate BIG feelings by giving them opportunities to talk about their feelings, name their feelings and identify ways to "shrink down" the intenstiy of it all. I know that this works, because I've seen it in action (both at home, and at my office).
Simply download our free printable to start the discussion with your child about how BIG his or her anger is. Keep a few on hand to use when you see your child's anger is amping up. Talk about how you can shrink it down to a smaller size. For some ideas, go here.
Print out our download and keep several on hand for kids to use when they are getting angry. Encourage them to go back and circle the smaller sized shape as they feel their anger shrinking down. For some ideas on helping kids shrink their anger down, go here.
More on Anger
Subscribe to our Anger Toolbox for Kids to get an introduction to our one-of-a-kind, time-tested, teacher and parent approved system for helping kids shrink down anger in a marked and lasting way. At Kidlutions, helping kids deal with anger is one of our specialties. We have developed and perfected our techniques in the past 25 years! We know they help angry kids!
A very savvy reader from our Anger Toolbox for Kids facebook page asked, "What do you do if the child's anger is too big to fit on the page?" An excellent question, for sure! My response was, "You get as much newspaper as it takes, and allow the child to tape as many pieces together as they see fit, until they can draw how big their anger is." Pure simplicity. An excellent way to validate a child's feelings.
MORE Help for BIG ANGER in Little Kids
Check out our post on Books That Help Kids Deal with Anger.
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More Resources to Help Kids with Feelings
9. Helping Kids Deal with Sad Feelings (the article that gives 5 tips)
And More Resources
Wendy Young, LMSW, BCD, is the founder of Kidlutions and co-author of BLOOM: 50 Things to Say, Think and Do with Anxious, Angry and Over-the-Top Kids. She is the creator of numerous workbooks and resources to help from the preschool through the teen years. Follow her on Pinterest, Instagram, Twitter and Facebook! She'd love to see your smiling face there!